Last week we took up The Challenge of Choosing to Be Kind, the Winter 2015 issue of the Blue Mountain Journal, including starting the title article where Easwaran answers frequently asked questions about choosing kindness. This week let’s continue that extended article, reading from page 11 to the heading on page 21. The section is full of insights and practical tips, including this striking metaphor about focusing all our attention on what is best in others:
“This is one of the most practical skills I have learned from my spiritual teacher, my grandmother, and it can be tremendously effective in helping those around you. It is something like turning a flashlight on a particular spot. I don’t diffuse my attention to take in both positive and negative behavior; I keep concentrating on what is kind, what is generous, what is selfless, and the amazing response is that this kind of support draws out and strengthens these very qualities. Not only that, as they become more secure, such people begin to spread this consideration to their other relationships too.”
Is there a relationship in your life that you wish you could improve? Read this article for tips from Easwaran. Try applying those tips, even if you can’t apply them directly to this particular relationship.
A challenge: is there a situation or person that annoys you or makes you impatient? This week, put special effort into focusing on the positive in that person. Whenever you think a critical thought about the person, correct it by reminding yourself of a positive quality. When interacting, focus on their positive qualities. When you remember the interaction afterward, or when you talk to others about it, purposely focus on the things that you had in common or that went well. You will need your mantram for this exercise! Share your brave experiments.
And for bonus inspiration, here is a six-minute video in which Easwaran describes how by training our mind, “We can become part of the Sea of Love while living on Earth.”